Thursday, March 7, 2013

"I'm too BUSY to Date!"

It's college life, people are busy making plans, they're planning for tomorrow's homework assignment or next week's midterm or the end-of-semester final or an internship or a big project at work or an application into a special program or grad school.

Life's busy, it's a fact.

What I think a lot of young men (and young ladies) don't understand is that life will continue to be busy--for the rest of your life! If you don't make time for dating, it may never happen. (Que the ominous music)


Shawn and Shelly met in a dance class. Shawn liked Shelly, so he asked her out on a date. On a Friday night they made dinner at her apartment together, then Shawn and Shelly rode the Front Runner to Salt Lake City to see the lights and take fun photos and sip hot chocolate and eat fancy desserts. Shelly had a fabulous time and was eager to see Shawn again after Thanksgiving break.

During Thanksgiving break Shelly only heard from Shawn once. She was worried that Shawn might not want to see her again after the break. But she kept her head on and waited to see what would happen when she returned to Provo. A week or two passed and she didn't hear from Shawn. She saw him once or twice on campus, but he seemed distant. She was confused because she was pretty sure that Shawn had been interested before the date, during their date, and during Thanksgiving break when they talked on the phone.

One day, Chad, Shawn's best friend,  approached Shelly and jokingly asked "So, how's Shawn?" he added a wink. Shelly told Chad that it had been a while since she had seen Shawn and she wasn't sure he wanted to see her. Chad assured her that Shawn was interested in her, but that he probably just felt like he didn't have time to date. Shawn felt that pursuing Shelly would be unfair to her, because he knew it would turn into a relationship, and he knew he wouldn't have time for a relationship. Yada yada yada.


First things first.

Girls understand that you're busy, most likely, they're busy too. It might be hard, but it's important to make time for people in your life. Whether Shawn realized it or not, Shelly would be perfectly happy being in a relationship with him, even if it meant spending a lot of time together studying in the library.

Dates don't have to be time consuming, expensive, or exhausting.

Think about it, people have to eat. Solution to the "I don't have time to date" problem? Make dinner together, or if you don't have time to make it, go out. If you're dating, take turns making dinner for each other (It can be nice to have someone help you out with the cooking--especially when you're so busy studying for that upcoming midterm)

I guess it comes down to reassessing priorities. Do you or do you not value relationships (family relationships, friendly relationships, romantic relationships)? If you do, make time for them; the other things will work out.

Just some thoughts,

Lady L.

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