Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Which Suitor is Suitable?

Some self-talk from Lady L.

The pressure is on.

Now that Lady L. has returned from her arduous journey, everyone asks "what's next?"

That is the question.

Well, let me tell you. I'm working on it! Life just comes at you, and you have to deal with it. Since returning from my journey, I have been  on a few dates with a few different men. And, like any normal nice lady, I see good in all the young men. The problem is, I'm not planning on splitting my heart that many times. (No Voldemort-horcrux action going on here today!)

After Friday night's dinner, my date and I had a discussion about where the relationship was going. And I honestly didn't have an answer for him. I told him I would think and pray about it and get back to him.

So here's the question. How do I pick which suitor suits me best? None of them are perfect, I know that. I don't expect it. Yet, I feel that they each have individual value to me. I obviously can't date them all.

Sometimes I wish my life were like a fairy tale--when the princess has multiple suitors, the king just sends the suitors on a quest, some sort of challenge to prove their worthiness. The victor then wins the princess as his prize. Voila! The suitor and the princess are married. Whether he is a kind and impressive prince from a faraway kingdom, or an underdog peasant with excellent wit and determination, the princess and her love are united. And they both live happily ever after.

Unfortunately life doesn't work that way. This Lady's father wouldn't set up a quest like that, and she probably wouldn't like whoever won the contest anyway.

The key lies in one (sometimes frustrating) principle: agency.

Ladies need to decide what they want for their lives! Create a vision. Set goals. Develop talents and gifts. Find what makes you happy--then do it! As ladies do this they should consider what kind of man would fit into the life/lifestyle they have envisioned. Then, they should choose accordingly.

Simple enough, right?

It is, but putting it into practice can be difficult--especially when emotional attachments form.

Good luck, Lady!


Lady L.

Photo credit: Google

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